The Song of the Glorious Arsh
I'll sing you the song of the glorious Arsh
As I heard it myself long ago;
His transfer was rumored all over the world,
Yet no one could say where he'd go:
Whether golden-eyed Chelsea would pay well to sign him
Or wine-sipping Barça would pluck off the vine him
Or Midas-like Wenger would prospect and [...]

Gareth Barry's Disgruntled P.R. Rep Tells All
"When your name is a byword for bravery—
Here's the thing—you can't go crying 'Slavery!'
Without putting the skids
On the love of the kids
At a club that thinks that stuff's unsavoury."

And for Accounting Purposes, My Name Is Ronaldo "Ronaldinho Gaucho" de Assís Moreira
Ronaldinho, now Barça's a fetter,
Has been told that Man City is better,
And would happily go
For the same rate as Jo,
Meaning roughly ten million per letter.