Omnibus of Allies

I should turn this into a podcast, because it would be funny to hype it to death and then read out URLs for half an hour. But the only good theme song I can think of is “Pretty Ballerina,” and that’s a wall of fire I’m not prepared to step across. Thus, our pact with prose is renewed for one more outing.

So there’s a tournament coming up this weekend that will stun heroes and turn statues into children. Since I’m on tap to cover it for a few outlets other than this one, I’ve been thinking about how to keep you all—especially those of you who aren’t doing this with me on Twitter—contained in the loop. I want anyone who cares to have access to the latest software, but I don’t want to drive you crazy with neverending Windows Defender updates. So I thought that for the duration of the tournament I’d put up a weekly or twice-weekly roundup post conveying links to the ongoing flash. You know, maybe throw in some outside content of note. You find yourself, in other words, at the cosmic doorstep of The Run of Play Presents Occasional And Largely Self-Promoting World Cup Links. Welcome to the spangled frontier.

This week, the action has mainly been on Yahoo!, where I have strung together the following pearls of price:

• Recreational team-building continues to wreak havoc on France. Anelka falls off his bike.
• Walking away from the World Cup. Dos Santos threatens to quit. [Please take special care to enjoy the 1,030 extremely frightening comments.]
• Clever economists pick Brazil to win the World Cup.
• Regular reality not good enough, to be replaced by augmented reality. A look at that Telegraph piece about how electricity is changing us as fans.
• Penguins try to play soccer, fail. Like Winston Churchill, I do not suffer untalented penguins gladly.
• Nelson Mandela’s World Cup appearance in doubt.
• Introducing the Curse of the Henry Handball. An attempt to blame the vengeful spirit of the Irish for the rash of pre-World Cup injuries. Later superseded by the realization that it all came down to Chelsea.
• Thousands stampede outside Nigeria-North Korea friendly.
• Carlos Simon, your controversial USA-England referee. This is what I get for saying I like bad calls.
• Prince William’s fiery speech inspires England team. Awestruck before the amazing outburst of leadership from this modern-day Henry V.

Just as importantly, please direct your attention to this basically unhinged interview I gave to Norman Einstein’s:

• “It’s Going to End Badly for Both of Us”: A Conversation with Brian Phillips. On BAFC, the Nike World Cup ad, and why the aftershock of Enlightenment politics means George Clooney will never be drafted.

And to a couple of good causes produced by other minds:

• Football Nomad, an ongoing making-of project for an in-progress documentary about two Australian brothers traveling to the World Cup. I anticipate their movie and respect their friendly ways.
• Soccer’s Lost Boys: World Cup Dreams and Nightmares, the trailer to another forthcoming documentary, this one about child trafficking in African football. Scary, gripping, and deserves your attention.

Also, N.B.: A week of labor on multiple fronts has convinced me that there’s no way to keep BAFC going during the World Cup. Too much gear-shifting, and it would be totally overshadowed in any case. There will be two new entries this week, bringing us to an electrifying cliffhanger, as well as a kind of preface. After that, we’ll have to wait till after the tournament to find out what happens on Hoth. My hope is that it will give us all something to live for after Brazil take all the trophies and the years ahead swallow us like sand.

Never fear, however; this is where I live and I will be constantly on hand to overreact to the deeds of the Slovenians.