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Kim Jong Il Triumphs Over Death, Hits College Soccer Game

Posted By Brian Phillips On October 5, 2008 @ 9:37 am In Uncategorized | 2 Comments

According to completely unsubstantiated reports in North Korea’s entirely state-controlled media, supposedly gravely ill dictator Kim Jong Il has emerged from his cocoon of secrecy in order to attend…a soccer game.

No one knows what soccer game, except that it was purportedly played to celebrate the 62nd anniversary of the founding of Kim Il Sung University, the country’s premier institution of higher learning, no pun intended.

But utterly unverifiable statements from North Korea’s deeply untrustworthy central news agency describe Kim as honoring the occasion with the following clearly sincere and not at all made-up sentiment:

The revolutionary and militant students in our country are good at art and sporting activities while devoting all their wisdom and enthusiasm to the study of science for the country and the people.

Also, they make unbelievable tapas. Anyway, I thought you should know.

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