Weirdest exchange between Derek Rae and Tommy Smyth during the last two quarterfinal games (tie):
1. On Hamit Altintop
Smyth: ‘Hamit’ means ‘golden ball,’ you know.
Rae: ‘Altintop’ does.
Smyth: Right.
Rae: ‘Ball that is golden.’
Smyth: One or the other.
Rae: I’m surprised you don’t remember our Turkish lessons during those very pleasant days we spent in Istanbul a few years ago.
Smyth: Oh, I remember.
Rae: Tommy, I’d have thought you’d remember that ‘top’ means ‘ball.’
Smyth: ‘Golden ball,’ that’s right.
2. On American teen pop
Rae [dutifully reading promo]: Tonight, on the Wonderful World of Disney, don’t miss the premiere of the Jonas Brothers’ new sitcom, ‘Camp Rock,’ together with never-before-seen footage and a new Jonas Brothers video.
Smyth [with unfeigned enthusiasm]: What a great group—you know, I met Nick two years ago after a performance of the Beauty and the Beast. He has a wonderful new single out now called ‘Just a Little Longer’ that’s about livin’ with diabetes. And you know, ten percent of all the profits they make go to the Change for the Children Foundation, one of Nick’s charities. ‘Just a Little Longer.’ Great single.
[incredulous gaping pause]
Smyth: Just a great single from Nick.
Rae: You and teen pop. Whatever will it be next.
Smyth: Well, but the Beauty and the Beast—that’s everybody’s favorite.
Rae: True.
The fact that I wake up every day feeling thankful that ESPN assigned the announcers it did to this tournament should not in any way be taken as a slight against John Harkes and JP Dellacamera.
Read More: Euro 2008
by Brian Phillips · June 22, 2008
I don’t know whether to love or hate these two. The mixing in of Andy Gray has confused things even more. When Italy went one up against France, Gray said something like,
“France will equalize, I’m sure of that.”
Then, when Italy scored again,
“France are out of the tournament.”
These offhand absolutist declarations fascinate me even as they annoy. The difference between one goal and another; it’s like opening the box on Schroedinger’s cat.
Andy Gray is on ESPN now? They had a perfectly good ‘analyst’ person in that ex Middlesborough player, what’s his name?. He might not be very excitable or exciting but at least what he has to say is pertinent in the context of the game, quite unlike Smyth who besides his obvious biases has failing eye sight to boot.
I think you mean Robbie Mustoe. He stays on-topic, it’s true, and has very little to say about the bulgedness of onion bags, but his commentary is so minimal and reserved that he can seem almost sour. There have been a couple of high-excitement games in this tournament when I wanted to check his batteries, because it seemed like every comment he made started with a sigh and ended with a shrug.
Andy Gray, somewhat to my surprise, seems to have struck a chord with American viewers—maybe because those absolutist declarations that Richard points out take away a lot of ambiguity. (Was that a terrible call? Andy will stright-up tell you.) He’s able to be disgusted when disgust is called for but still preserve his basic enthusiasm for the game. I agree that his groundless total certainty can be annoying, but he does a better job than anyone else on ESPN of providing an emotional context for the game.
Random Tommy Smyth fact of the day: Did you know he’s lived in the U.S. since the early 1960s? How hard do you think he has to work to preserve his accent at this point? I think if I’d lived in Ireland for 45 years I might have lost some trace of my charming American brogue.
He might use it to talk nonsense, but that’s an accent worth striving to keep. God’s own brogue, that.
Yes, Mustoe it is, thank you Brian. Btw has Andy Gray used his “that wasn’t a foul…he was just strrronggr!” line yet?
A friend of mine once next sat next to Henry Kissinger’s brother at a dinner party.
Said brother was several years older than Henry the K, and conventional wisdom would have it that his Germanic accent was therefore more established at the time that they emigrated. Nevertheless, at least by the late 70s, he spoke without any trace of said accent.
When my friend asked him how he and his brother could sound so dramatically different, he quickly responded with what must have been a standard reply.
“It’s simple. I listen to other people.”