Probably not. You know how these things go. But it can't be warming the cockles of Brian Barwick's Mr. Belvedere-sized heart to know that the England coach, already under investigation for tax evasion in Italy, is now being investigated for perjury in connection with yet another sensational legal case involving corruption in Italian football.

I am picturing the human brain as a map of lights in the dark, lights that flare up, in complex patterns, when we see something we recognize, when we make a decision, when we think of a word. In the apartment building across from mine, American Idol comes on, and a hundred tiny televisions start [...]

The papers today are ganging up on poor injury-riddled Harry Kewell, who is about to leave Liverpool having played in just 18 games over the last two seasons. Diligent economists at the Telegraph calculate that he cost the club £157,554 per game, while the Daily Mail, rounding up on principle, says £160,000.
Lay off Harry Kewell, [...]

At some point in the history of televised soccer, someone must have used a stranger phrase to describe a goal than "pure animal physics," but no example springs instantly to mind. What does it mean? How could anyone say it in such a cheerful and satisfied voice, when it sounds euphemistic and horrifying, like some [...]

Since we took the time to criticize Buzz Bissinger for his comments about sports blogs last week, I want to take time now to give him some credit for his interview with the Big Lead today, in which he responds to the controversy and apologizes for his remarks. I'm not going to say that it [...]

The art of being an elite club in European football is the art of forgetting how to be happy. The competitions you don't win have to sit like a stone in the middle of your consciousness of the competitions you do.
Stoke City (“not an elite club") were ecstatic this weekend after a 0-0 draw with [...]

See? See? What have we been saying all this time? You should never mess with Harry Redknapp!
What's that? Oh, you do want to mess with him? Fine! Why don't you try charging him with suspicion of conspiracy to defraud and false accounting? Does that sound good to you, "City of London Police"? Well, then, issue [...]

Woah! What the hell was that? Hey, guys? Can anyone hear me?
Man, I wish I knew what was going on. I was just taking it easy down in the swamp, using the water to support my enormous bulk—you know, the way we do—and munching on some of the tree-leaves I was able to reach thanks [...]